Every year, as we near October, I remember the babies we have lost. We lost our first one in October 2010, seven years ago. In the months that followed, we lost three more. Four babies I couldn’t wait to hold. But in those months, I also experienced the love of some great friends.

All this month, I’ve been talking about friendships. Last week, I shared one thing we can do to be a better friend. But really, there are so many things we can do! And they’re not hard!

Here are 10 easy ways to be a great friend.

10 Easy Ways to Be a Great Friend

1. Invite them over for dinner.

Or, if dinner intimidates you, invite them over for dessert. Surely we can all throw a batch of brownies from a box in the oven or buy a tub of ice cream. (And really, you can’t go wrong with chocolate or ice cream…or both!)

2. Send them a letter.

Email and Facebook are great, but there’s just something special about receiving a card in the mail.

3. Pray for them.

Better yet, write out your prayer and send it to them.

4. Call them.

Maybe you’re not a phone person. To be honest, I don’t really like talking on the phone. But there’s something to be said about talking to someone on the phone versus through a text. You can’t hear pain in someone’s voice through a text. You can’t sense tears.

If face-to-face is best, over the phone would be a close second.

But I get it. You can’t always talk. If this is you, then by all means, shoot a text. It’s still a wonderful way to tell someone you are thinking of them.

5. Schedule a time to catch up.

I know you’re busy. We all are. I know it takes initiative. But it’s also the best way to build a relationship with someone.

6. Pick up their favorite candy bar or some other special treat at the store.

One of my friends knew how much I loved Tide laundry soap (and how rarely I buy it because I’m so cheap). Without my asking, she brought over a jug of Tide just to show she cared. As lame as it might sound, that meant the world to me.

7. Be the person who will listen when life is hard.

They will have plenty of people offering advice or trying to fix someone’s problems. But there might not be anyone who will simply sit and listen.

Be the person who will mourn with someone….who won’t be afraid of tears or silence or pain.

8. Be genuine and honest.

One thing that bugs me about many people is that they feel they have to always have their lives together.

And let’s be honest. Most of us don’t. We’re not doing anyone a favor by pretending our lives are perfect.

9. Be available.

I’m a huge fan of boundaries, and I’m by no means saying you need to always be available-24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

What I am suggesting is that you build enough flexibility into your schedule so that if someone needs to chat for a few minutes, you have the time to listen.

If your schedule is so full that every interruption is an annoyance, maybe your schedule is too full. (click to tweet this here)

10. Care enough to tell them the truth.

Or in other words, hold them accountable. If you see them slipping into something that you know is dangerous, love them enough to speak up.

And a bonus:

11. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.

Use your words to build up and encourage your friends, not to tear them down.

Any other ideas of ways to be a great friend? I’d love to hear them!

*I originally wrote this post in 2012, but it has been updated here.